


First Look

by hazellepotter



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Autumn, Autumn Season - Freeform, Beach House, Beginnings, Best Friends, College, Crush, F/M, Frenemies, Friendship/Love, Love Triangle, Memories, Moving On, New Beginnings, Old Frenemies, Pining, Revelations, Summer Memories, Summer Vacation, University, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-09-02
Packaged: 2020-10-05 23:36:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20497226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazellepotter/pseuds/hazellepotter
Summary: But now she could see him, and she couldn't look away.





	First Look

Pansy Parkinson had been in love with Ron Weasley for as long as she could remember, but there was only one problem. 

He was not in love with her; he was in love with Daphne Greengrass, who also happened to be her _best friend_. They got together this last summer while Daphne stayed at Pansy's beach house, and Pansy continued to torture herself pining after Ron in silence. 

What Pansy didn't know was that Ron's best friend, Harry Potter, was doing the same thing over her. Every year when he went to Ron's beach house during the summer, he would long for Pansy's attention, but she only had eyes for Ron. It was like a fucking soap opera, and Harry was sick of it. 

They were both sick of pining after things they couldn't have; that's why they were both thankful for new beginnings. They were starting college now and would be away from their personal failures, _or so they thought. _

Too bad Pansy hated Harry and Harry hated Pansy for wanting his best friend over him, otherwise their upcoming college experience would have been a piece of cake. 

But nothing was ever meant to be easy, not in Harry Potter or Pansy Parkinson's life.

They were fighters; they would have to fight for the ending they deserved, or at least the ending they had always wanted.

* * *

As much as Pansy loved Daphne, she was happy they were going to different universities and even _countries_. The goodbye was rough. There were many tears and mascara stains on each other's shirts, but Pansy couldn't help but sigh from relief as she watched Daphne drive away. What she needed was a little separation and to not be reminded of Ron Weasley. 

She didn't understand why he had never liked her. She was attractive, or so she thought. Her dad had money, and she was charming as hell, but he never wanted her. He always appeared uncomfortable when she talked to him, and that made his stupid friend Potter pipe up with his sarcastic opinion that she didn't ask for. 

_Potter._ Thank god she would never have to see him again, or at least until next summer. She smiled to herself at the thought. 

He was the most annoying person she had ever met. She felt he was so self-righteous, just because he was some child prodigy hero. She didn't even know what for, but Harry Potter was well-known. The best part about Ron was that she could tell he loved Harry for other reasons than his status; that made him even more endearing to her. Yeah, Pansy had a representation for being a rich bitch, but she still had a heart. You just had to dig deep for it.

Maybe that was her problem; she was too guarded after her mother died. She wasn't sure, but it sure wasn't something she wanted to think about.

As she lugged her suitcase up to her dorm, she prayed to God her roommate would at least be semi-tolerable. As she turned the handle to her room, she took a deep breath. 

Once she opened the door and her dorm room appeared in front of her, she had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. Her roommate had already arrived, and she was one of _those_ girls. The type that was overly anal and uptight. The girl that had neat rows of post-it notes covering her bulletin board instead of pictures of her friends. She was the type that was here on a full-ride scholarship, aka, _Pansy's worst nightmare._

Her new roommate looked up from her desk instantly and gave her a big smile. Her curls were blowing wildly from the fan on their windowsill, and God forbid, she was wearing the most hideous dress Pansy had ever seen. She greeted Pansy with intense formalities.

"Hermione Granger," she said. She stuck her hand out for Pansy to shake it. Her nails were unpolished, and Pansy figured that was the first thing she would convince her new roommate to invest in if they _had_ to be friends. Nail polish.

"Pansy Parkinson," she told her, "Nice to meet you."

Hermione gave her a nod and sat back down at her desk. She was typing away at her laptop and didn't say another word as Pansy set her suitcase down on her bed and started to unpack. It got to the point that if Pansy had to hear her nails hitting her keyboard for just one more second, she was going to scream.

"How much homework have you done already?" Pansy asked sarcastically, but Hermione didn't hear her tone. She answered her seriously.

"I'm already three weeks ahead. I would like to be two months ahead if I can help it. I really want to start studying for finals."

Pansy gave her a deadpan stare that Hermione couldn't see. Her back was still turned to her and she was facing her laptop screen. Pansy didn't even know what to say, so she continued to adjust the picture of Daphne she had pinned to her bulletin board. She stared at it for a long time wondering how she was doing with Ron as they traveled the world abroad together for college. Pansy could feel jealousy bubbling up in the back of her throat, but she tried to push it down. Her thoughts were interrupted by a knock at their door.

Hermione shot up from her desk instantly, and Pansy watched how fast she moved. She apparently had been expecting company. 

When their door opened, she saw the person she had never expected to see.

_Harry Potter._

Pansy had to stifle the groan building up in the back of her throat.

"Harry!" Hermione squealed. She wrapped her arms around his neck and gave him a big hug. Harry patted her back warmly, and they moved apart. It was then Harry caught sight of Pansy. His eyes widened, and Hermione noticed.

"You-uh, know each other?" She asked.

Pansy rolled her eyes, and Harry crossed his arms, "You could say that," he said.

Pansy scoffed, "I have seen him every summer of my life for the past ten years at Ron Weasley's beach house."

Hermione's eyes widened, _"You're Pansy?" _

Pansy raised her brow and watched as Harry turned beat red. He gave Hermione a look. 

"Yes?" Pansy said awkwardly, "I told you that when I walked in-," but Hermione interrupted her.

"This is such a small world. Ron or Harry didn't tell me you would be coming here with Harry and I."

"You-you know Ron?" Pansy stuttered.

She watched Harry's mouth turn to a frown. Was her love for Ron still that obvious? And why did Harry always have to be so sour about it? She knew she was pathetic, but this just made her unrequited love worse.

"Yes," Hermione answered, "Ron, Harry, and I have been best friends for years. I'm sure you have heard about me?" She raised her brow and gave Harry a look.

That's when Pansy remembered them always talking about their other best friend back home, but they called her Mione.

Before Harry could answer, Pansy nodded, "Of course, but they just called you Mione. I didn't make the connection before."

Hermione's smile brightened, "I figured. I basically hold our group together."

Hermione nudged Harry in the shoulder, and Harry playfully rolled his eyes.

They all didn't say anything for a few seconds, and Pansy tried to look anywhere but at Harry. She could feel his eyes on her, and she could feel Hermione's eyes on him. It was awkward as fuck.

"Well," Hermione finally spoke up, "Harry and I were going to go to dinner, would you like to join us?"

Pansy was about to answer no, but Harry beat her to it, "I can guarantee you she will not want to, Hermione."

Pansy glared at him, and he gave her a sarcastic grin in response.

Hermione gave him another look, but he ignored her.

"I'll just see you around, Hermione. I have some studying to do," Pansy lied.

She watched as Hermione's face brightened at the prospect of studying.

They finally left Pansy alone, and she groaned loudly as she fell back on her bed. 

_This could not be happening. _

* * *

Harry didn't come by their room again after that night, instead, he would meet Hermione in the commons area. Pansy knew it was because of her, but Hermione reassured her that it wasn't. She quickly became fond of Hermione, to her own surprise, so she wanted to believe what she told her, but she didn't, and for some reason, it bothered Pansy that Harry was purposely avoiding her.

It was mid-September when she saw him again. She was walking across campus after her last class and listening to the leaves rustle in the wind. She took in a deep breath and smelled the pumpkin spice from the coffee shop down the way. She was tempted to go get one, but she stopped in her tracks when Harry Potter came around the corner. She suddenly felt nervous, and she felt stupid that he was making her feel nervous. Before at her favorite beach town, she would just roll her eyes and ignore him as she pined after Ron, but now she could see him for who he was, and she couldn't blame Daphne for having a crush on him so many years before.

His eyes were like emeralds; the kind her mother used to wear when she was small. It made her feel nostalgic and oddly safe. His black hair was blowing in the wind and was wildly disheveled. It reminded her of when she used to watch him and Ron on the beach on their surfboards. Ron had filled out before Harry, but Harry was more muscular than Ron now. It was like he had grown up into a man just in the last few weeks she hadn't seen him before they started school. She couldn't believe she still had no idea they were attending the same university, but it occurred to her then that she tried to talk to Harry as little as possible in the past. 

She must had been gaping for too long, because Potter approached her with his eyebrow raised, "See something you like, Parkinson?"

Pansy rolled her eyes, _"No,_" she lied, "I was just shocked to see you still exist. You haven't been by to see Hermione in ages."

He scrunched his brows together in confusion, "Did you want me to come to the dorm? You have always hated me and have loved Ron, I just figured-"

It was then she heard the bitterness in his tone, and it occurred to her that maybe Daphne's comments for years had always been right. _Harry liked her_, maybe even in the same way that she liked Ron. She felt her cheeks flush at the thought.

_"I-,"_ but she didn't know what to say, so she just closed her mouth. They stared at each other for a few minutes. She had never allowed Harry to look at her so deeply before; maybe she had always been afraid.

_Ron Weasley was safe, but Harry Potter was not._ He had a dark past that hardly anyone in their old beach town knew about, and he was not open to share. She had always been drawn to mysterious things, but during the summer, Pansy had always wanted to escape from her own darkness. The beach house was her safe place, it was the only place she could go to forget her own demons, but Harry Potter always had the capacity to make her face herself. She realized that now; she only paid attention to Ron to _not_ pay attention to Harry. He would force her to face the deepest parts of herself and her pain, and that was the scariest prospect she could think of.

Harry's face softened as he watched her recollections rise. It was like he _knew_ what she was thinking about. He surprised her next by putting a piece of her hair behind her ear. He lightly grazed her ear and shivers ran up her spine.

"Pansy, do-do you want to go get coffee?"

It was such a simple request. The kind that should have been an instantaneous "yes" without any fear, but Pansy could feel her heart beating a million beats per minute. She was breathless when she answered him.

_"Yes."_

She watched his green eyes smile even when his lips did not. It was a peculiar experience, and it made Pansy smile herself. They walked towards the coffee shop in silence, and all Pansy could hear was her own heartbeat and the leaves crunching underneath her boots.

Autumn was the time for new beginnings, much like college was supposed to be for everyone their age. She never expected to find a new beginning in someone she had known for so long. She supposed it was because she never really allowed herself to see him before.

But now she could see him, and she couldn't look away. 


End file.
